


oh what might have been

by clizzyhours



Category: Shadowhunters
Genre: (kind of!!), F/F, Parabatai, Pining, clizzy are in-love okay, creative liberty, i try various writing styles out, set during 3.21/3.22
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-04-23 01:17:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19140673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clizzyhours/pseuds/clizzyhours
Summary: "She thinks of them in battle together. Isabelle is a force with her whip, uncoiling like a snake or blunt force with her staff as she strikes her enemy’s heart."





	oh what might have been

**Author's Note:**

> to all the shadowhunters wlw's and clizzy fans.  
> also: slightly unedited fic.  
> thank you so much & enjoy!

Clary is terrified. Her heart is thrumming loudly and her fingers are unsteady, shaking with nerves.

She has thought about this a lot. Ever since she heard the word parabatai, she has been intrigued by the concept. (no, her mind whispers. you are intrigued by a certain somebody.)

Being bond and connected to somebody? Feeling power surge and working together in tandem? Someone who would never leave you?(and oh what insecurity she has.)

She has seen the positive and negatives with Jace and Alec and has heard stories of the great Will Herondale and Jen Carstairs, stronger than many other pairs.

The idea astounds her and yet she knows this truth: she doesn’t want to be parabatai with anyone but Isabelle.

She thinks of them in battle together. Isabelle is a force with her whip, uncoiling like a snake or blunt force with her staff as she strikes her enemy’s heart.

Clary focuses on how she utilizes her dual knives, throwing them with ferocious speed at her target. Her palm unleashing golden sunlight and striking.

She thinks of their moments together. Isabelle showing off her science experiments and pulling her under duval covers to make a fort, tugging Clary by the hand as they sit and paint nails, giggling like school girls.

Shopping trips and the constant next mission, side by side.

Clary drawing Izzy. (She has a sketchpad with entire drawings of Izzy, some scribbled furiously and others slow but careful. Long dark hair and ruby lips.)

She’s always so excited to show Izzy her art of places she has drawn and people she has seen. Isabelle always looks at her with a soft expression, says in her Izzy-way of how beautiful the picture is and it thaws the ice in her chest each time.

She remembers the first but brief time she saw Isabelle in Pandemonium with cascading dark hair, stretchy white two piece clinging to her figure, and her whip unfurling. Beautiful and strong. Powerful but scary with two men dressed starkly in black, weapons shining in electric light.

She hadn’t thought about it in that moment, preoccupied with protecting the woman turned demon away before she went scattering across the ground, fear and terror devouring her whole.

But she remembers that brief moment and it’s a lot.

She remembers waking up and seeing Isabelle’s beautiful face, attentive and compassionate despite Clary’s distress.

Clary remembers a lot about Isabelle. Her smile at Alec and Lydia’s almost wedding.

All the times they have trained and sparred and practice together, eyes dark with something she could never quite pinpoint. (oh, she knows, but they can’t. they can’t.)

The pain she felt on Izzy’s behalf during the dark days of Yin fen, their arguments that felt akin to a breakup.

Their reconciliation and everything that has ultimately led her to this very moment.

It hurts to think of what she can’t have. Isabelle, Isabelle, Isabelle, her mind, body, and heart sing.

She ventures into Izzy’s weaponry domain and begins with a heartbreaking, fearful smile. Is it obvious? She wonders.

A deep breath and a moment later, she begins. “Isabelle, would you ever considering becoming my parabatai?”

For a moment, her entire world freezes as she stares into Izzy’s soulful brown eyes.

It hurts and sometimes she thinks the longing for Isabelle will kill her.

Her world shatters when Izzy answers yes and she’s utterly consumed.

Isabelle embraces her and she is lost.


End file.
